A man asked me once if I had ever seen the devil. I told him I did not believe in the devil, and yet I had seen him many times: I see him every time I walk downtown and, looking at those starved Faces, those signs that read “pregnant & homeless,” Satan walks right on by, arrogant and unperturbed. He moves straight through the crowd and steps With his polished shoes into a department store, Never turning around, never glancing back. Sir, I have seen the devil many, many times. |
Author's Comments
So this was written with the INTENT of spoken word, but I dunno. It was another English assignment.
Also, yes, I realize I reference Satan/Lucifer quite a bit in my pieces... I guess I just fail at coming up with metaphors, lawl. |
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Comments
It's a very good metaphor, points out a flaw in our society, and is well written and worded and put together. I'd grade this assignment with an A. One thing to watch out for...
"I see him every time I walk downtown and...Satan walks right on by." It's hard to stay consistent in a sentence when we go off on a description of one element, so it's important to look for that. Maybe say something like:
"I see him every time I walk downtown. I'll look at those starved faces, those signs that read '
Just a suggestion. Still, excellent work!
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We lie beneath the sea, stars lapping at our feet. I lie to you; you lie to me; we lie beneath the sea.
See?
Thanks very much.
--
We lie beneath the sea, stars lapping at our feet. I lie to you; you lie to me; we lie beneath the sea.
See?
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